What the hell has happened to MLIA? What once used to be a funny commentary of everyday life and ordinary experiences has degraded into repetitious banality. 8 out of 10 published submissions on MLIA deal with one of the following:

• Harry Potter allusion or reference - “Today, I walked into a room and said lumos …”; “Today, I saw someone who looks like Ron Weasley, called him by name and he turned around …”; “Today, blah blah blah Harry Potter …”
• Forts
• Laughing/giggling at the “irony”
• Doing something age inappropriate
• Where’s Waldo
• Something happened that “made my day/year/month/life”
• Sending “I love you” texts to random numbers (although this has sort of phased out)

Really, the list goes on and on. A case can be made that the rampant rehashing of these and similar stories is what makes them average in the first place. But there is a thin line between prevalence and mediocrity. Commonality does not necessarily make something average.

Nothing is more insulting as a graphic designer than when someone mistakes a hideous, clip art infested, MS Publisher created, gag-inducing “flyer” as your work. You really think I would make something like that? And to tell the person who obviously shat it out of her ass while blindfolded that it’s “real [sic] nice” makes me die a little inside.

fleetfootedfox:

digitalbath:

lifeofryan:

acewepeel:

galvatron:

caitastrophe:

nataliejo:

thenicolasserhan:

RAIDERS.

I’M A MOTHERFUCKING ROCK.

I am not joking.

BRUINS.

Apparently it’s a bear!

When I was in school…

Cardinals

GAMECOCKS

the missionaries. and our unofficial campus cheer is ”missionaries, missionaries, WE’RE ON TOP!”

High School-Generals
College-A dragon?

^^ *cough*flamer*cough*

High school I was a hilltopper.

My high school’s mascot was a buffalo, and my college mascot was a roadrunner. But I’d like to add that my boyfriend’s high school mascot was a unicorn. A UNICORN.

via fleetfootedfox.

Closer

The part of me that doesn’t want M to know that I still think about her outweighs the foolish other part of me that thinks she even cares. So this will be for me. And maybe if I want to show someone else, I’ll do that. You know, like L or N. But I must admit, those two have been very aloof when M is mentioned. L even referred to her as “the girl in comm class,” even after I said her name (full name!).

It’s almost as though L and N planned to stage an intervention they never carried out. That they’re just applying the “rules” or “guidelines” or whatever the interventionist told them would help me, to our conversations. “If A mentions M, ignore it. If that’s impossible to do, avoid saying M’s name. Someone that captivated would only derive pleasure from knowing he or she was the impetuous of this sacred name being spoken. And because this name carries so much meaning, hearing it said by someone else will just further drill the memory and thought of the person attached to that name into the sufferer’s soul. It’s inextricable. We don’t live in a world where the treatments in ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’ are practiced. So don’t pick at the wound with your breath and vocal chords working together to send this name out to bang on the sufferer’s eardrums. Just let it go and maybe the scar won’t be so noticeable. We can only hope.”

That’s how I imagined it went.

But they didn’t stage my intervention. Maybe I showed early signs of recovery. Maybe they were both too busy. Maybe no one cared enough.

Ding ding.

If only some Universe-funded game show awarded me money for knowing the right answer to my life’s problems, I’d have enough to get away from here and all the memories. But if it did, I would have to return the prize because knowing the answer and carrying out its logic are two vastly different things.

Maybe it’s time we give something new a try.

After much digging, I’ve finally managed to free myself from the rock under which I’ve been pinned for the last two weeks. I guess you can say I’ve been “busy”. The automated scrolling on the Dashboard has made me lose track of how much content I’ve missed, but it’s an optional feature I’ve enabled, so I’ve only myself to blame really.

During the course of my absence from the interwebs, I’ve realized a few things:

• Roger Federer can do no wrong in my eyes. When he lost the Australian Open and cried on court, I felt so so bad for him. It even brought me to tears. But when Andy Roddick lost their epic final Sunday past, I just wanted him to suck it up and take it like a man. But really, Roger is pure genius. In my opinion anyhow.
• No matter how hard you try to act civil and be nice to people, sometimes they just won’t let you.
• My mouth gets me into a lot of trouble too frequently. I sincerely would like to change that.
• Jacqueline Ortiz on WOAI is the most annoying news broadcaster ever. Every time she introduces the meteorologist, the banter goes a little something like this: “Man, Siobhan, I tried to run this morning, but I lasted 10 minutes. I couldn’t believe how hot it was.” OK, Jackie, we get that you run. Yay for you. But seriously, we live in South Texas and it’s fucking July. Why are you surprised it’s hot?
• The Starbucks Doubleshot on Ice+Energy is heaven in a cup.
• Imitation is not always the most sincerest form of flattery. Sometimes it’s just annoying and weird.

(via morebetter)

You know it!

via morebetter.

I wonder if Flickr will accept movie files sent as an email attachment from the iPhone 3GS as they do now with photos. And I wonder if Vimeo will offer support for that, as well.

txtsfrmlstnght:

(484): New word for getting laid so we don’t sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport

via txtsfrmlstnght.

Yeah, L.

via lovehopehate-deactivated2009061.

After hearing about AT&T’s hijacking of their “valued customers’” souls via iPhone 3GS pricing, I decided to give them the big heave-ho and terminate my contract with them early. Doing so results in a $175 early termination fee (ETF) from which they subtract $5 for every month you’ve had your current contract (I’ve had mine for 11 months or however long since the last iPhone was released). But I would only do so just long enough to be a “new AT&T customer” who would receive fair pricing for the iPhone. Of course all of this would mean that I would very likely lose my current phone number, but I’m OK with that because the Art Institute of Pittsburgh won’t stop calling me.

In the five days since I’ve devised this crude plan, I’ve made my mind up at least 12 times on what to do. But now, I just really feel like saying screw it and pay twice as much (those bastards) for the new iPhone and call it a day.

This is all very stupid and amazingly trivial, but my phone, even though I’ve just had it for 11 months, has been dropped a couple of times (once down a very steep trail) and just isn’t doing it for me anymore. And one of the speakers isn’t working. And it doesn’t have video!!! And it isn’t the latest version (well you know, when next Friday rolls around at least).

I’m at a very banal crossroads. Give into corporate greed and pony up the extra cash for the latest and greatest (arguably) or go through the rigamarole just to prove a point (and save $100)?

What would you do?